Courage

Overcoming insecurity:

I used to be a shy, quiet girl, except when I was surrounded by my family or close friends who I felt comfortable with. I was afraid that no one else wanted to hear what I had to say, that I would offend someone or hurt someone's feelings, or that the world would not like me. Two jobs that have helped me overcome my shyness and anxiety are teaching group exercise classes and working for 2 years as a college RA. Both these jobs forced me to speak to large groups of people weekly, and eventually it became more natural. I learned that most people forget what you say by the following day (so it's ok if you mess up). What tends to be more memorable is the feeling and intention behind my words. Also, I have found that most of the time the way that people treat you tends to have more to do with their mood and what is happening in their life than about their attitude toward you. If someone doesn't say hi back to you or ignores you, it is most likely because they are having a bad day. I still sometimes worry about what I say and how the world perceives me. When I remember that God's love and value of me is more honest and meaningful than the world's perception of me, I feel safer and my anxiety tends to diminish.

 

Here is one of my favorite quotes that my best friend shared with me:

"Courage is not about breaking the rules to prove to others that you can do exactly what you want. It is not about inviting suffering into your life either, just so everyone can see your unflinching devotion to God. Having courage is not a question of accepting everything that happens passively. To have courage does not mean shrugging your shoulders or sighing, 'What can I do? It's my karma.'

On the contrary, having courage means engaging in every single situation as a blessing from God, as a loving gesture of nature. Courage means rising to meet the demands of each moment with total delight, knowing you are equal to it. Courage means having faith that within you is an innate force whose essence is never depleted by external events. Live your life courageously, dharmically, knowing that whatever you are faced with is not stronger than you are. You are equal to each other. Your problem is not greater than you are, nor is it smaller. "

Sometimes when I am feeling down, insecure, or sad, I forget that this very moment is a blessing. At times when we feel completely alone, misunderstood, or excluded, we can remember that God understands us. God loves us and wants us here. Day 6 of the Master's Makeover states that "true security doesn't have anything to do with our own talents or accomplishments. It has to do with knowing who we are in God's eyes. When we rest in God's love, we're reminded that He is enough for us. When we let our hearts be filled with His love, we can finally relax. We're secure - free from the need to prove anything. [...] You are secure in God's love."

Just look outside! Do you stumble upon the scent of a lilac or get to see an amazing sunrise on your walk to work. I think these moments are little gifts from nature/God to remind us how much we are loved. Even if no one else in your life takes the time to give you a gift or tell you they love you, God doesn't forget about you.

Even at moments when I feel like no one understands me I am not truly alone because God understands me completely and will always lend a listening ear. All my hopes, desires, questions, flaws, and mistakes are safe with God and I know that He will love me no matter what.